Christmas with young children can be a time of great stress for families. Parties, disruption of schedules and pressures in family gatherings can make it difficult for us to enjoy the parties. Today We interview the psychologist Lola Pérez Bravo who will give us some advice so that parents can live a Christmas without stress.
Lola Pérez Bravo She is a psychologist, associate professor in the Department of Evolutionary and Educational Psychology at the Autonomous University of Madrid and a large family mother, since she has three children of five years, four years and two years.
What are the situations that can increase parental stress at Christmas?
Some of the situations that generate some family stress can be:
What can we do if the family criticizes our way of deciding to celebrate the holidays or raising our children?
I think we should all learn to respect parents' decisions regarding the upbringing of their children and how each family decides to celebrate these Christmas holidays is also an option that should be respected by the rest of the family.
What positive communication strategies can we use to minimize pressures?
Assertiveness is a good tool to overcome family pressures that parents are subjected to.
We have to try to explain adequately and assertively that we appreciate the advice received and that we will take them into account if necessary, but that we will decide what is the way in which we want to celebrate these holidays and we will let you know so that they have knowledge of it, requesting that respect as much as possible the personal decisions made.
Should we let the child eat things that we don't consider convenient?
We must recognize that Christmas is a time of excesses even for us adults and many times we ourselves are eating or drinking things that we do not consider convenient ... so I wonder how we can prevent our children from eating something we do not want at these parties , when we are doing it ourselves. We are your models. It is difficult to prevent them from doing it if they see that we do it. So perhaps more than preventing them from eating something that we do not think is convenient, we should explain that they can take it because we are at Christmas parties, but that it is something exceptional so that when they finish it will be something that we cannot do as usual.
What if they give them gifts that seem inappropriate? Do we notify before? And if they don't respect our way of seeing this issue?
A possible suggestion to avoid giving gifts to our children that we consider inappropriate is to send the letter to the Magi and / or Santa Claus to our family and friends so that they know what gifts are those that we think are convenient to give to our children as well as to that know what are the main needs that we want to cover with these gifts (clothes, school or sports equipment, educational games). In case, if you decide to give them something that we do not consider convenient, we can always resort to the possibility of a return, trying to explain that it is a gift that we do not consider necessary at this time and we would prefer to exchange it for something that we can use more.
Can you give us some tips to make the holidays a moment of harmony that fosters positive values in our children?
My main advice is to “always enjoy our children”, try to live this magical time of the year for them with them and, above all, always show them our love and affection and tell them everything we love them.
Is there a better positive value than the love of our children?
We thank Professor Lola Pérez Bravo, a psychologist, for this interview she has given to Babies and more about the stress of parents at Christmas and we hope she helps you to have a Happy Holidays full of love. We will continue with our Christmas tips.
