A few months ago we told you that the colecho, or what is the same, sleeping with the baby, is beneficial in many ways, both for the baby and for the parents, and that consequently we could not only consider it an option to have in mind, but perhaps the best option.
When we talk about options we are mentioning possible choices that parents will make. However, many parents end up sleeping with their children, not by choice after thoroughly considering the different options, but as a final resource to get some rest, after seeing that his son, where he best sleeps, is next to his parents. Come on, many parents explain that they would never have done it for them, but that either they put him in bed or no one slept there.
We talk then that sleeping with the baby makes him rest better and that the parents also rest better. Now, many parents who do not sleep with their children and many couples who are not yet parents can see this as a risky practice and are very likely to ask: Isn't it risky? Can't it happen that I crush or asphyxiate my baby if I sleep with him?
Have you ever crushed your partner's arm?
Before responding, let's see how you sleep right now with your partners. I imagine that you both share a large bed and that sometimes you turn to one side and sometimes to the other. Have you ever crushed your partner's arm? Because I have never done it, and if by a casual I have noticed that I was getting on it, I immediately changed my position.
While the dream is deep we barely move. It is when the dream becomes superficial again when consciously we change position because we are not comfortable and then we go back to sleep. We neither crush our partner nor fall out of bed, and for this reason, because we are aware that we are accompanied and we are aware of the limit of the bed, when we sleep with a baby we are aware that it is there.
What happens if we look at real cases
Ok, I can imagine that this from your partner's arm and not falling out of bed can be unreliable. Well, let's see what happens when real parents are seen sleeping with their children. In a study discussed in Jeanine Young's "Bedsharing with Babies; the Facts", they recorded about 800 hours of video of mothers sleeping with their babies. In all that time they saw that, even when the mothers slept, they seemed to be aware of the presence of the baby (it must be that they say that women are able to sleep with one eye open). In addition, they explained that none of the babies were in danger of being crushed or suffocated, however close it was from the mother's body.
A few years ago, when I went to the IHAN Breastfeeding Congress in Ávila, I remind a rapporteur to explain this, after hours and hours of recordings to mothers sharing a bed with their babies. He added that when sleeping together neither the mother nor the baby almost never turn their backs on each other. In fact, the most common position of the mothers was that of "C", with one arm under the pillow and with the "C" shaped body, as if protecting the baby inside.
On the other hand, we must bear in mind that babies are not an arm. It could happen that someone put us on his arm and he fell asleep (I don't know if someone has been provoked by someone else, but sometimes I wake up with an arm asleep from the position I was sleeping in), but a baby does not passively accept a suffocation. When something prevents them from breathing they cry and resist, struggling to survive.
But there are babies who die with their parents
Probably now you will be remembering some of those news that speak of a baby who dies when he is crushed by his parents in bed, or of a known case in which the same thing happened. True, some babies die in their parents' bed, but it is also true that some babies die in their cribs. That is, a baby who suffers a sudden death can suffer both in the crib and in bed. How do parents know that they have suffocated him? They do not know, they simply believe that it has happened because of them, because of sleeping with the baby.
But beware, not all babies who die sharing a bed with their parents do so because of sudden death. There are babies who die because of their parents, because they sleep with their children without taking into account that you have to take into account some precautions to share a bed with a baby, the most important being those that say you cannot sleep with your child if you drink alcohol or use any drugs, because the state of alertness will be logically altered, and neither if you are so tired (or tired) that you do not trust that you can be alert to your baby's groans.
But these are not the only precautions. You also have to be careful with the baby's position when sleeping (never face down), with avoiding bedspreads and cushions around the baby and other recommendations that you can read here.
Concluding
The risk of suffocating a baby is very low, if not nonexistent. People have, even sleeping, a minimum level of consciousness that allows us to sleep with our partners without getting on top of them and sleeping in a bed without falling from it. This faculty allows us sleep with a baby without getting on top of him.
Likewise, babies cry when they can't breathe, so if the unlikely situation of a father getting on top of his baby happens, he would cry to let him know he can't breathe. The father would react and release his baby, unless he was sound asleep because of extreme fatigue or having taken substances that prevented him from reacting. Both situations (being too tired and taking substances that produce sleep) are reason enough not to share a bed with a baby, as we will be putting your life in danger.
And badly, if none of this convinces you and there is still a small trace of doubt, you can always carry out one of the solutions that seem safer: the use of a baby cot. Dad and mom sleep in their bed and share space with the baby, who is not in the same bed of the parents, but in a crib attached to the bed.
Photos | Thinkstock
In Babies and more | Sleeping on the couch and sudden death of the baby: a new study confirms the relationship, After school, when to pass the child to the crib or bed ?, The safest way to sleep for babies is in their crib, face up and near their parents' bed, pediatricians recommend
