I found this list of 20 tips to badly educate a child Prepared a few months ago by Alfonso Fouce, child psychologist and Marc Giner, psychopedagogue and speech therapist, both with extensive experience in the treatment of emotional disorders in children.
Their knowledge in the field of child and youth psychology has led them to enumerate some of the mistakes that parents make most frequently with our children, very negative for their development and emotional balance. They are the following:
- Buy everything you ask for.
- Always be right when you have a problem.
- Let him talk badly, all his friends do it.
- Put a TV and / or a computer in your room (with unlimited internet access of course and if it can be with the playstation)
- Embarrass ourselves when he makes a tantrum.
- Do not give hugs or kisses, or tell you how important it is for us.
- Not to demand him in relation to the school or in the tasks of the school.
- Never punish him or call him attention to his behavior.
- Punish him every day.
Let the mother say no to one thing and the father consents to it or vice versa.
Squealing or stressing each day to do what we demand.
- Never play or talk quietly with him or her.
- Do not establish a minimum schedule or rules of the game.
- Do not ask him to collaborate with the house on the things that are within his reach.
- Allow the same things as his older siblings, or forbid them because otherwise the little one gets angry or makes a tantrum.
- Do not teach him norms and / or values, whatever they are.
- Believing that our son always lies to us will end up doing it.
- Believing that our son is bad will end up being bad.
- Do not set a good example.
- Do not do what we tell them to do.
I agree with everyone, although point 8 does not convince me at all. "Never punish him or call attention to his behavior," does that mean we should punish our children? Of course they do not refer to physical punishment (of that or talk), but I would say that it would be more correct to talk about setting limits, guiding them, and eradicating the concept of punishment, which is also a word that I don't like at all.
A lot is questioned about the validity of the punishment. There are other alternatives to get children to obey and meet certain standards, certainly more effective and much more loving.
