One of the behaviors that most concern parents and least tolerate society are the calls tantrums. They worry parents because they are times when children do not attend to reasons, cry inconsolably and are able to "break everything." And I say that society does not tolerate them well, because the most common at times like this is that people stop to observe the scene to observe what happens and how the mother or father will solve it.
Tantrums are the result of a conflict of interest between what children want to do or have at a certain time and what parents are willing to give, offer or give up at that moment. In addition, it is possible that problems may appear for other reasons, normally related to some type of lack, that children do not understand, that they live poorly and that they externalize with exaggerated behaviors that should serve parents as an alarm.
To lend a hand to all parents living similar situations with their children (most, I would say), Rosa Jové, known for his books on the dream "Sleep without tears" and on parenting "Happy parenting", has recently published a new book entitled "Neither tantrums nor conflicts", focused on the relationship between parents and children up to the age of 12.
It is easy to read online consultations of mothers who talk about the ages between 2 and 4 years (approximately) referring to "their first adolescence" and there are even programs on television to try to modify the behaviors of children who most externalize their discomforts and that most disagree are with their parents (you know, Supernanny type).
Among all the professionals who try to help parents and among all the articles that can be read about tantrums and bad behaviors there is one in particular, well known on the internet, of the same Rosa Jové, very interesting (that you can read here and that ends with a phrase that summarizes its way of proceeding:
Love me when I least deserve it because it will be when I need it most.
This phrase, so strange, for being contrary to what is usually recommended, I recorded it in my memory from the first day I read it and there it continues, helping me in the bad moments with my children to approximate positions, instead of moving them away.
This book comes to give ideas and recommendations to understand this phrase and to make living with our children easier.
