We continue to prepare for Father's Day with interviews that tell us about the meaning of fatherhood in today's world, of men committed to raising their children. Today we are going to talk to Óscar Romero Ramírez, a wonderful dad who also works as a teacher since 1999.
Óscar has not stopped looking for tools with which to grow both professionally and personally in these years and currently alternates his work as a teacher in an active pedagogy school, with the upbringing of his children of four and two years, yoga classes and his hobby , create children's board games.
Has fatherhood changed the meaning of your life?
In my case, having my first newborn child in my arms was like doing an awareness analysis of the position I was in; Father and son at the same time. A little voice inside me said “Well, now it's your turn. What are you going to do with you?
Suddenly the axis of the universe changes and a wonderful, totally dependent little person comes home who, without your intention, will test everything you knew so far.
That affects, right?
The way in which this affects each person I think is totally different depending on their personal moment, their situation as a couple, the circumstances of the baby's birth ... but without a doubt, there are many things that change places in our scale of values.
Before becoming parents we think that having children will be one thing, but when they arrive, we are not really and do not act as we thought we would. Has it happened to you too?
I just didn't know what father I am. I just try to take advantage of the opportunities that I find to enjoy life and involve the people around me. I strive every day to take advantage of my virtues and extend them to my family, tame my defects and try to transform them into virtues, as far as possible. It is not easy.
What personal areas have you worked thanks to fatherhood?
In addition to being wonderful, fatherhood also entails an important work of self-giving, reflection and confrontation, in which you test your capacity for empathy, tolerance and submission of that selfish self that gets angry when it does not do what it does. He wants, among many other things.
Are you the father you want to be?
I try to maintain a balance between what I want and what I owe, just as you can never get everything you want, because the desires are volatile and are changing, I try to find points of union between the edges of the different facets that form our life, to try to make room for all those things and aspects that I think are important and necessary for them and for us.
Children teach us many things, what have you learned thanks to your children?
The ability to love unconditionally. The possibility of being someone "fresh" at every moment. As the wise say, avoid dragging past impressions and carrying them into the future. The capacity for wonder and discovery.
The possibility of seeing each day as a reason to feel happy.
The rediscovery of the game, in fact I have become so fond that I have designed several educational games for children. It is impressive what is currently on the market. There are many things of very good quality beyond Parcheesi, goose and connect four! You relive the stage of being a child in many different aspects. It's great!
Do you reproduce the way you educate your parents or have you changed things?
There are aspects that I think are right, others that I try not to repeat. In general, I feel happy to have received a fairly coherent system of values, another thing is the methods with which they have sometimes tried to instill those values. I try every day to take the positive from my education and transfer it to my children.
Can you reconcile your family and work life?
The ease or not to reconcile I think it depends a lot on each person, their job, their economic needs, their values regarding the upbringing of children and also their willingness to reconcile. In my case, my working conditions have allowed me to reconcile and survive the attempt, especially in regards to economic aspects. Although, at a general level, I believe that the institutions do not take into account the need for a social policy that takes this aspect into account and the importance it has on the current generations.
In addition to being a parent, you are a teacher. Have you noticed a change in the participation of parents in the education of their children?
I do not think that I have been so many years to appreciate a change in that aspect. If that is true, that every time there seems to be a greater supply of new educational models for children. From homeschooling, free education, living education or active methodologies that are gradually gaining more presence in educational options and that indirectly is a vehicle that facilitates the participation of families to a greater or lesser degree. On the other hand, I think that in the previous generation a lot of importance was given to material values, I want to believe that nowadays more and more people are realizing that it is not worth not seeing your children all day to buy them a new tablet Sharing a time reading a book from the library or playing hide and seek around the house fills them much more than any object. The problem is that the labor system does not always allow you to choose how much you want to work and the worst thing is that the salary does not always cover basic needs and families do not find options.
Do you like the education system in general?
The simple thing in these cases is to be somewhat defeatist. But, the truth is that from my experience during these years, to think about the education system in general is to homogenize something that really is not so much. Yes, it is true that they are governed by general criteria, but it is also true that within the system you can find quite a variety in terms of the methodologies used, the educational projects and the internal functioning regimes of the centers.
Are things changing at school?
I believe that the new generations of teachers are increasingly interested in methodologies that foster meaningful learning, which is what really becomes knowledge, and this happens when the individual, the child feels really part of it. This is achieved by participating directly in the learning process, manipulating, hypothesizing, experimenting, testing what you know, contrasting it with what you have discovered.
How is the school where you practice?
It is a school that despite its large size and organizational complexity fosters the spaces in which learning takes place between children of different ages, based on experience and manipulation, where experimentation is the basis for the construction of knowledge , encouraging dialogue and the exchange of experiences as a source of doubt and at the same time research. Individual rhythms are highly respected, but at the same time individual responsibility, effort and teamwork are encouraged. One of the cornerstones is the creation of learning projects. When you start each course you don't know what you will work that year. Certainly, you have a work guide marked by the Primary Curriculum, but we work without textbooks. The projects arise from the interests and doubts of the children.
In my school each course ends up being a surprise and at the same time a creative challenge.
We thank Óscar Romero the interview he has given us in which he shared with us his vision about fatherhood, conciliation, parenting and also the future of education.
